I am having a difficult time not being able to talk to my mom everyday. The car rides home from work everyday our one of the worst. That's when I would call and speak to her everyday. And today, Saturday, I woke up and was letting the pups out and feed them and the cat. And I wanted to talk to my mom, so I had this burst of energy and did laundry and cleaned to get me through the pull of needing to talk to her. I am praying for this ache to go away and believing it will, it just takes time.
This week, I came to a realization for me. During my conversations with my mom, I always heard about the good she did. But at her funeral, I actually got to see the proof. My mom taught adults how to read, to help them succeed. I met three of her students that day. I was so proud to be her daughter, proud of my mother and proud of her students. But it has made me ponder. Am I doing enough for the Lord? And I am coming to the answer no. There are a ton of excuses that come, we just changed churches, I work late, I have to have time for my family. But I keep asking myself is my faith dead because there is no action? I wittness to my co workers but outside of everything I am not serving. I think that's my issue, I need to be serving somewhere.
My mothers whole life was about serving. I want and need to make a change. I want to make a difference like my mother. I am amazed by her. For goodness sake the mayor of my hometown named February 5, 2013 Gladys Elanore Winton Day. You go mama!